Or quit foxing me, dog. Or, I don’t know. I’m really confused right now. All I know is this game of leap frog is getting a little annoying… but you’re cute, so I guess I’ll let it go on for a little while longer…
You may think you do, but I can guarantee that you don’t wanna challenge me to a game of hide and seek. I don’t want to brag, but I am just gonna tell you straight out that I am absolutely a pro at hiding and seeking.
You wanna know how long it took my owner to find me the last time he was stupid enough to challenge me? Two months. MONTHS. He had to put an ad in the paper and flyers all around our neighborhood because he thought I was “lost,” but in fact I am just that good at this game. So really, do you wanna go? I dare you.
I can see it all now! The laughter and hilarity! The heavy-handed but still poignant moralist soliloquies at the end of every episode! “Magic-Spiced Bacon” is going to be a worldwide sensation!
… okay, so maybe the title could use some work. But still. How could anything this full of cuteness not be completely and totally amazing?
There is freedom enough for only one of us, and I’ll tell you right now it’s NOT going to be the canine. So get your scaredy-cat behind back in your kennel! This living room has a new master, and his name is Cockatoo! And his mohawk renders your argument completely invalid.
This little goggie doesn’t know how you intend to spend your Saturday, and quite frankly he doesn’t care. He doesn’t even plan on remembering this weekend.
No, instead he’s headed to his local fairgrounds for Pugtoberfest, where he plans to get completely wasted on all of the free kibble and bacon he can stand to shovel into his mouth. Last year, he was so jacked up on bratwurst, he woke up in his kennel wearing his brother’s Lederhosen. Good times, good times.
At the Xixiakou Wild Animal Preserve, in Weihai, China, an orphaned litter of white tiger quadruplets is being raised by a very maternal dog after being abandoned by their mother.
Generally white tiger litters are limited to one or two cubs per litter, and zookeepers suspect the mother abandoned her cubs because the rare quadruplets were simply too much for her to handle. Now the cubs are being raised alongside the mother dog’s two puppies, and they sleep and nurse together as though they were all biological siblings.
Even more interesting is the fact that three of the four cubs are snow tigers–a rare variation of white tiger born with white fur and blue eyes. Less than 200 are estimated to be left in the world, and so their adoptive mother is even more of a hero for helping to preserve a rare and fast-diminishing breed of animal.
It’s okay, Buddy. I know you’re sad that the puppy ate the last of your milkbones, but I just saw momma jump in the Subaru, and I bet she’s on her way to the store right now to get you some more! Until then, I’ll cuddle your sadness away, okay?
… and hopefully you have some fleas in your fur. I could use a snack, myself.